Sunday, October 10, 2010

X-Ray Vision



I had to go to the vet again yesterday for an x-ray to check my lady parts, just in case eggs were blocking my reproductive tract and raising my blood calcium levels so high. As you can see, there are no eggs showing, only a few of those pesky urates destined to be flushed out soon. If you look closely you can see the seam where Dr. Johnson cut a trap door in my shell to remove the bladder stone a year ago. Since it's on the flip side, I think I'll skip any shell rejuvenation methods. Besides, I earned that seam the hard way!

I did find out there's no such thing as Tort-O-Pause, so my body will produce eggs for the rest of my life. As I get older, I'll produce fewer eggs, but my ovaries won't ever get time off for good behavior. Imagine 100 years of producing eggs!

Since my x-ray didn't show a clutch of eggs or Chilean miners or Barbie shoes or anything like that, I will get to hibernate outdoors afterall. This x-ray was The Ultimate Decider. But I'm hearing talk of making me stay in the new burrow all winter so they can check my weight every two weeks to make sure I'm surviving hibernation in good form. I'm not thrilled with this idea, as you know how I love the old burrow which is now dug part way to China (Hi, Dr. Lu!) But it's so much better than spending the winter indoors like last year, even if it was cool to celebrate all the holidays I usually miss. But maybe they'll decorate the outside of my burrow while I get my beauty sleep all winter. Oh I should be a real looker by next Spring!



I'm already looking a lot better with a green beak, pink tongue and alert eyes. Plus I'm cruising the whole yard and checking in at the drive-up patio door just like Tortellini, although she's not as ladylike as me. If I don't get out of the way, she climbs right over me. Somehow it feels like all is how it should be though. That's just how Tortellini rolls. She's a tortoise on a mission while I'm always more social and gracious. If they x-rayed Tortellini, they might find the Energizer Bunny in there.